Day 104: Hurt By Love

Psalms 55:12-14

For it is not an enemy who taunts me then I could bear it;

it is not an adversary who deals insolently with me then I could hide from him. But it is you, a man, my equal,   my companion, my familiar friend. We used to take sweet counsel together;

within God's house we walked in the throng.

I know so many people who have turned their backs on love or closed themselves off to love because they have been hurt by people who said they loved them. They claim to be hurt by love, “if this is what love feels like I don’t want it.”

There is so much honesty in the scriptures above. David is saying, it’s not a stranger taunting me, if it were I could bear it. But it is my brother, my friend, my equal, my companion, that hurts me. We used to be friends, we used to talk, I used to be able to trust you, but at some point your love turned to hate. Many of us can relate to these words David is speaking so honestly, many of us have been in this position. It’s not the people be barely know or we don’t associate with much that breaks our hearts. We could bear that pain, but it becomes unbearable when it’s close to you. It’s the people we trust, the ones we love, it’s the relationships we’ve invested in that cause us the most heartache. When you love someone, in any way, you are emotionally attached to that person. When you trust someone, the worst thing they could do is betray that trust. It’s the people we care about most that cause the deepest wounds within us.

Another place many people experience the most pain is the church. Ironic, I know, but I have known so many people, myself included, who have walked away from the church because they we hurt so deeply by the people that claim to be Christ followers. A lot of this comes from hate, which is the opposite of God. I know people who lead ‘different lifestyles’ are often shunned by the church. The biggest group this happens to is the LGBTQ+ community. I have met too many people who have sought to come to Christ and been bashed by the church, and even gone as far to be kicked out of church. That is not the love of God. God loves ALL PEOPLE every single one of us, He loves. We don’t get to decide who should receive God’s love and who shouldn’t, we are not God. Too often this treatment comes from the church. The place that is supposed to be overflowing with love.

Church hurt is the worst hurt. It’s a place where we go for healing, fellowship, and place where healing takes place. But many times it is the opposite.

I can say from experience that these experience will make you want to give up on love completely. I remember going through a time when all of my “friends” who I considered family turned on me. They did so much prior to this, but they all up and left, walked out of my life, and shattered everything as they left. Not only did they do that but they continued to deepen the wounds as secrets and envy was uncovered and brought to the light. I felt like I was going to die. It felt like someone ripped my heart out of my chest and millions of people were trampling over it. I was so heart broken that I felt the pain physically. I could not stop crying. I would be okay for a second and I would just start crying. My heart was shattered. But… there was still a piece of me, a very small piece of me that knew that God’s love is not like this. It took so much for me to even come to terms with that. Because these people were church going people, they claimed to be Christians. If the church people can treat me like this and not care, can I really trust anyone to truly love like God? Questions I had as I went through this time. But God…

-Dyamond

Let me be the first to tell you if you haven’t heard, God’s love is not that way. God’s love cannot be tainted. God’ love cannot be reversed. God’s love is unconditional, it does not hurt. God’s love can heal the hurts caused by those who claimed to love you. God can take your broken heart and nurse it back to health with love alone. God shows us how we are to love, but He also shows us how we are to be loved. He loves us the way we should be loved, unconditionally. He will never decide one day that we are unworthy of His love, we are so worthy that He sent His son to die for us. Love should not cause pain, it should not hurt. When we truly know the love of God we will know how to love others, and ourselves unconditionally. We cannot know love if we do not know God. We cannot give love if we do not know the love of God. God is love, and God is perfect, His love is perfect. It will never hurt or harm you.

Psalms 147:3

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

You might have been hurt by people who said they love you, but God loves you so much more and He has the love that will heal that broken heart. You might have experienced it in the church, but God can show you what it truly looks like to receive Godly love. Know that God’s love is the greatest love of all. Love doesn’t and should not hurt.

Luke 23:34

And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments.

God provides healing to broken hearts, and He also gives us the ability to forgive. We must forgive the people who hurt us the most, it is the only way we can truly move on, and even be healed ourselves. Once that wound is closed, there’s no need to keep opening it again with unforgiveness. The hardest part will be having to forgive someone when they never apologized or acknowledged what they did. Sometimes we have to accept an apology we will never receive. Once you forgive, let it go, it’s hard to forget, but let it go, do not let it affect your life any longer. God can and will free you from the pain, and bring you to forgiveness.

Reflection

1. Have you been hurt by people who said they love you?
2. Have you been hurt by the church?
3. How did it affect the way you receive and give love?
4. Have you been rejected by the church?
5. Do you believe that the love of God can heal you?
6. Do you think that you are able to forgive the people who have hurt you?

Prayer Time

Allow you answers to the above questions guide your prayer today. If you have been hurt by love, or the church, or are going through having your heart broken, bring it to God. Every piece, lay it at His feet. Know that, no matter who you are, God loves you. He loves you so much. And you are so worthy of His love.

I love you so much, and I hope you have an amazing day or evening! Make sure you share this with someone and come back tomorrow for day 105?